i thought i escaped all of that

so i used to live in this apartment building in west philly that was pretty decent for undergrad and grad students. i know a lot of people who lived there at least once in their lives. it's like some sort of coming of age ritual or commonality that we all share. i still know a few people who live there.

anyway, there is this really weird guy who worked at the reception desk. he talked to himself, had a short temper, and from what i understand did an excellent job of creeping people out if you shared an elevator ride together. he also did an outstanding job of creeping out my exgirlfriend at the time. from what i understand, management gave him room and board if he worked reception. he didn't creep me out so much but i did always make sure my back never faced him when he was near.

so i moved on and i live in my center city building now and things have been kicking rad for like a year and half now. my building is full of young urban professionals and if anybody was creeping anybody out, it was going to be me. so everything's rad until like a month ago.

the first time i saw her, i was exiting the elevator in the early evening on the ground floor to pick up a package at the front desk. our paths were crossing when she entered the elevator and said, "have a great morning" and stopped right next to me as if she was waiting for a response. i was kindof dumbstruck because i was still parsing what she said to me at 6:30pm in the evening and was trying to find its context. so i just said "ok, thanks you too" and kept going. maybe she was just tired and said the wrong thing. i know i do that too sometimes at the end of the day so i just wrote it off as an isolated incident.

before continuing on, she's a late 40ish to 50ish woman. five foot two or three. diminuitive. really short gray hair. she kinds of reminds me the really early simpsons episode where the parents hire that woman criminal to babysit the kids. well obviously, she really stands out in my building.

so like three weeks ago, i saw her again in the gym running really slowly on the treadmill. she was wearing a button-down dress shirt, untucked, and a pair of denim shorts. she looked weird but she was giving it her all out there. a while after that, i saw her again downstairs in the gym on the treadmill; this time in a sports bra and denim shorts. gravity didn't do her right. i didn't appreciate the imagery of this sweaty 50ish woman.

a week ago, i was walking back to the apartment and i saw her jogging down the street in front of me in a dress shirt and denim shorts. the scary part was that she looked like she was ignoring the car traffic in the streets she was crossing. i thought she was going to get hit by a car and a few cars stopped right in the cross section to let her go. at this point, i'm like wtf. she crosses the street to the other side but then back pedals back into the street into traffic without looking. she jumps back on the curb and then back pedals back into the streeet a few more times. at this point, i'm like super wtf. cars had to stop. i was standing on the opposite curb. i'm the kind of person that helps people but shit, i wasn't going to jump into traffic to pull this retarded woman out of the street. she finally gets the cars' honking messages and runs down the sidewalk towards our building again. before getting there, she runs into the indoor parking garage next door, freaks some people out, and then runs out of the garage and finally into my building.

tonight, i was on the treadmill and she comes in and gets on the treadmill next to me. dress shirt and pair of jeans. seriously, wtf. anyway, she starts running and i finish up and get off the treadmill. i say "do you want me to leave the tv on?" and look at her. she didn't even hear me, she had her eyes closed, and she had her face towards the ceiling. i just walked away and left the tv on.

and then she killed me in my sleep and posted on my blog. seriously, wtf is going on here.